August 29, 2008
Hi,
I was hooked up with a good guy for a possible marriage. We are both in our 30's. After three months of talking over the phone, I finally met the guy. I liked him right away and I think he did too. The second day things got heated up a bit we kissed and flirted beond acceptable for a second date. We did not go all the way but I let a lot happen because we are in differnt cities and I thought we had to make sure we really liked each other especially since marriage was the plan. (I truly feel terrible about what he might think of me). Now the thing is that by the time I left for the airport, he was way too detached. He told me over the phone that he could not wait to see me again but I am not sure it's true. Should I ask him how he feels about me and our next steps or do I just stay cool and let things dry up?
by Doc Rogers
Dear concerned, I think you should get to know someone a lot better before you start talking marriage. It already sounds like there's a lot of drama in this relationship, but you've only met once? If you are curious about how he feels, ask him bluntly, and then ask him to be honest with you. Tell him you deserve to know how he feels.
Is this an arranged marriage? Each of your first marriage? Talking over the phone for three months doesn't equate to the type of solid relationship that is needed to get married. It might be a start, but you two definitely need to spend more time together.